Roy’s Wonders ….. The Chosen Ones !!!



The key thing about picking horses you think have a good chance of winning ,and sharing your final picks with the rest of the universe, is to ensure you have a good enough excuse when it all goes tits up. Last year was a prime example of when it all goes wrong, and the reason it all went wrong is that the horses I picked didn’t like the cold weather, and to say last years at the festival was cold would be the understatement of the year….it was f*cking freezing, and I can definitely say that the horses I selected last year were fair weather animals, they’d only perform with the sun shining brightly and with the temperature well in to double figures. There you go … perfect excuse for not picking any winners last year !!!!

So this year, I’m getting my excuses in early. As I mentioned when I went through the horses I’d wanted to put in the 2014 version of the Million Pound Punt in my last post, things haven’t quite fallen right this year and although I’m sitting pretty with the five horses highlighted already, I haven’t managed to combine them in anything like a seven figure returning bet, so I’ve had to turn Plan B and come up with some nice juicy priced selections that will have the bookies quaking in their rather expensive boots (probably bought courtesy of the proceeds from last years selections !). I’d already got a couple lined up, after studying some of the big field handicaps earlier in the week, they’re already carrying my cash and thankfully are still just about holding their price. So all I’ve needed to do is find another 3 or 4 decent priced certainties and we’d be sitting pretty. Now here’s where the early excuse comes in …………………

Most of my studying over the last 48 hours has been done whilst impersonating Roy Orbison !!!!!!!!!!! The last seven days has seen my body gradually fall to bits culminating in a case of conjunctivitis last Friday. This is where the problem really started as conjunctivitis is not good for a wearer of contact lenses so I had to search for a spare pair of glasses which only come out in emergencies. Said glasses were nowhere to be found – not that I could see anything anyway – instead all I could put my hands on were a ten year old pair of prescription sunglasses ….. cue Roy Orbison look alike !!!!!!

Now I know the sun has come out over the last couple of days but this is no excuse for me to sit around in a pair of Roy goggles inside my own home…the fact that these were ten years old and therefore half the strength of my current contact lenses only added to the problem.

So there you have it, my excuse, Roy Orbison, as far as I’m aware, was no top horse racing tipster, Roy Orbison never made a Million Pounds from punting horses at the Cheltenham Festival and Roy Orbison most definitely never did his ‘Travelling Wilburys’ whilst freezing his nuts off at Prestbury Park like I did last year !

I’ve done my best to come up with some lovely juicy priced selections that will make that seven figure sum, and if I’m really honest, I’m quite happy with what I’ve come up with. I’ve actually come up with more horses than I’d originally planned and this afternoon placed a series of bets that will net me nearer Three million than just One … but that’s just plain greedy , however I figured that there’s no harm in looking and thinking big so here goes with firstly five selections that could land us the first million, and then some further selections that you can do what you want with. Don’t worry, there’s no long write up on every selection, I’m keeping it nice and simple …. Eyes down …. Read on …..

Five Horses To Win Us A Million

Buthelezi (Novice Handicap Chase – Tuesday) – Currently 20/1

Trained by John Ferguson, who incidentally has never had a winner at the Cheltenham Festival (although he hasn’t been training that long, so we’ll forgive him that !), this 6 year old novice chaser has all the right credentials to land the last race on Tuesday and get THE Million Pound Punt off to a flyer. I’m pretty certain 20/1 won’t be available come Tuesday, it’s too big a price, so if you’re going to back it, get on as soon as you can !


Sea Beat (Fred Winter Juvenile Hurdle – Wednesday) – Currently 14/1

This Irish challenger, trained by Arthur Moore, gave a favourable impression when he won at Naas in early Feb. Before that, he’d looked like a completely un-genuine bag of shite, however the way he finished his race last time give me the impression that the penny has finally dropped and he knows he’s supposed to run quickly and in front of the other horses. He’s only Four, so has a lot to learn still but the good thing is, so have all the other horses in the race.


Une Artiste (Byrne Group Plate – Thursday) – Currently 33/1

Why this mare is 33/1 I’m not quite sure…she might not actually run in this race however as most bookies are Non Runner / No Bet then if it doesn’t run you get your dosh back…so nothing to lose…apart from if it does run and it runs like a drain. The thing is, I think it’ll run ok, in fact I hope it’ll run a lot better than alright. Une Artiste is no stranger to running well at the festival at a big price, she won the Fred Winter two years ago when she was a 40/1 shot and overall has a decent record at Cheltenham. She’ll carry a pretty low weight, which is ideal in this race however the one question mark is the ground..if it dries out too much then we might be snookered but I’m willing to take the risk. 33/1 is too big to pass up …. Here’s hoping this mare doesn’t have a mare come Thursday !


Buddy Bolero (Kim Muir – Thursday) – Currently 25/1

I make no apologies for having a feeling …. And with this horse, I gotta feeling ! Trained by David Pipe who has Red Sherlock & Kings Palace in his trust (see original selections from last post !), I just have this feeling that everything is right with Buddy Bolero when it comes to this race. Well almost everything, as Buddy does like a little bit of juice in the ground, so if it’s bone dry then we might have a little problem. He ran ok at the festival last year, so has a little bit of form around the course, but for an 8 year old he’s pretty lightly raced with only 11 career starts so must be open to some improvement. He’s my ‘feeling’ horse ….. try not to get caught feeling a horse … unless it’s a winner !!!


Anay Turge (Grand Annual – Friday …. The last race of the festival) – Currently 20/1

I’ve seen Anay Turge win already twice at Cheltenham over the last year…and I like what I saw. I’m pretty sure he’ll get into this race, although he’s entered in to one of the tin pot hurdle races too but I’m certain this is where he’ll end up. No pressure Anay, but by 5.15 on Friday, when the other four selections have p*ssed their relevant races then it’s all down to you to bring home the bacon….all Million Pounds worth of it. 20/1 won’t be the price either, he’ll be shorter on the day and I actually think he’s about the best value of any of the five horses…get stuck in now !!!


There you have it, five little gems, all at big prices, stick them all in the same bet,  and you’ve got a 5,847,659/1 accumulator …… F*CK ME …. Did you just see that, I’m going to have to re-name it again …. THE FIVE MILLION POUND PUNT !!!!!!! Unfortunately, it’s unlikely you’ll find a bookie who’ll happily write you a winning cheque for £5mil, so set you sights a bit lower, stick the five in doubles, trebles, 4-folds and an accumulator for small stakes and you’ll probably manage a million pound payout….you just inherited an Uncle Bob !


Whilst impersonating Roy O over the last couple of days,  I also came up with one or two other interesting little nuggets for the four days of sporting mayhem that await this coming week…so below are a list of some of the likely mules that’ll be carrying one or two of my very hard earned pound coins –


Twirling Magnet – 2.40 Tuesday …. Around 20/1 … I’m hopeful it will run here !

Time For Rupert – 2.40 Tuesday …. Around 20/1 … If the one above doesn’t run, then I’ll back this one.

Present View – 5.15 Tuesday …. 10/1 … In the same race as Buthelezi, I’m going to back them both !

Morning Assembly – 2.05 Wednesday … 7/1 … Value in a race where a couple are way too short.

Zamoyski – 4.40 Wednesday … 25/1 … Same race as Sea Beat but this price is too big….each way value.

Oscar Whisky – 1.30 Thursday ..Screaming to run over this trip at the festival for 3 years..todays the day.

If In Doubt – 2.05 Thursday … 8/1 … One of three I fancy in the race … you can back them all you know !

Thunder & Roses – 2.05 Thursday … 20/1 … Big price … the second of the three !

Seventh Sign – 2.05 Thursday … 25/1 … Bigger price … the third of the three !!!!!!!!

Knock A Hand – 4.40 Thursday … 25/1 … Same race as Buddy Bolero but price is too big if it runs.


So there you have it, you have now been enlightened with all my pearls of wisdom for the next week…. If you decide to follow me on this quest for untold riches, then best of luck…you don’t need to invest a fortune to win a fortune, which is great because if they all run like donkeys then you won’t lose a fortune either ! If you make your own selections may they all run really quickly however if they’re running against any of mine, then not that quickly !


Thanks for reading and share this with anyone you think might be bored and have five minutes of their lives they don’t mind wasting. I’m not sure if I’ll get a chance to update during the week however I’m sure I’ll manage to fire out the occasional Tweet to anyone that might be interested to see if I’m managing to survive, so feel free to follow me @GrahameLetts

Good Luck …. Here’s to winning a million !!!!


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